Grieving

Grief. A word that makes most of us shudder, either because it relates to the stress of work or sadly, the loss of someone we love. Mental health can be affected by so many different things and Grief is certainty one of them. I almost feel as if grief can have its own hold on you, somewhat different to your anxiety and depression that you can become used to.

I'm not just talking about grief in the traditional sense of the word, that someone has passed away but we can also feel this emotion for a range of difference situations too such as heartbreak or moving house. I think all of these involve a grieving process.

Supposedly there is a 5 step process to grieving, from denial to anger and to acceptance but that doesn't necessarily mean that everyone experiences grief in the same way or routinely every time it is experienced. I remember when I lost my Great Grandma when I had just begun primary school and I cried as soon as I found out the news. Later down the line I lost my other Great Grandmother and I didn't cry for a long time. This year I lost my Grandmother whom I was very close to. I think the first and last time I cried was at her funeral and only now 5 months on am I beginning to feel the pain of her loss. Some people may find that unusual but, it just shows how it can take hold in a variety of ways.

Experiencing heartbreak and loss of someone important in your life has taken hold of me in way depression couldn't in the past. I became lifeless and couldn't function at all. I didn't really cry, but I did find it extremely hard to get out of bed, even more so than perhaps some of my worst days of depression.

To me, grief can sometimes be a bigger beast than mental health on it's own because often becomes it's own unpredictable emotion, where as with my mental health I can usually predict the way it is going to turn out. The important thing is to allow yourself to grieve, it's normal and it's okay. It's also important to remember to look after yourself and your mental health at these times because it can often become overwhelming and debilitating to experience. Some may also be experiencing mental illness for the first time when they grieve, and that's okay. Look out for the signs and be that person that they can talk to.



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