My year in review 2016!

It's come to that time of year again where I look at the past year. I can't believe that I have been doing this for three years now! Where to start...

Although I expected this year to be one of little change, it turns out that there have been some things that have happened which have been unexpected, I suppose! One of my biggest achievements of this year was getting my first car and driving by myself. This is something that I was petrified of in the beginning, but as soon as I got used to it, it become second nature to me. This was even more so the case when I got my first paid job. If you have been reading for a long time, you'll know that getting a paid job was at the top of my anxiety hierarchy and after doing volunteering for two summers, I finally got the courage to go for a paid job. This was extremely hard for me. I spent many days crying both before and after getting the job, panic attacks whilst at work and swearing I would never go back because the anxiety it gave me was just too much. Nevertheless, this paid job allowed me to earn my own money and with that came a sense of achievement, it allowed me to drive my car alone a lot more and definitely increased my confidence. It also happened that this year, I handed in my resignation for this paid job too because with third year degree studies and working so many hours in a week, it just wasn't good for my mental health, so I took that challenging step too. Even though I only worked there for three to four months, I don't regret undertaking it.

In the ice bar of Amsterdam!
During this year, I also went on holiday with my friends to Amsterdam. Now, that was one of the best trips I have been on. I definitely recommend Amsterdam and I will hopefully be going back. I also went on my first holiday with my partner. This makes two holidays where I've had to rely on my own instinct to get home in one piece. I will hopefully be travelling a lot more.

As many of you know, I am now into my third and final year of my Law degree. I have managed to survive it this far, so I'm just hoping that I will graduate next year. Further to this, I also became the president of my university's mental health society in which we set up events for people to come along to and raise awareness. I also try to improve the welfare side of things at university by working with students and staff as a member of the welfare committee. It's a very busy final year and can also be very anxiety provoking!

Renting my own flat with my partner is something that I have never done before until now. In theory, it will be my first flat where I will no longer be a student and out in the big wide world of work. This will be the first time we will be living together outside of shared accommodation, so a new challenge will be underway!

A final challenge I can think of is part of my weight loss journey. Since January of this year, I had been determined to lose the weight that had been put on, partially because of medication. To this date, I have lost just over three stone. It has been extremely hard and for me, it's been about counting calories and going to the gym. Nothing more and nothing less. I have had times of crying, I have given up, but most of all I have still made it. I have little bit more to go, but If you put your mind to it, you can achieve anything. This is the same with your mental health. Sometimes, mental illness can require a lot of willpower to overcome your fears. Sometimes, you won't be able to, like I have felt many times before, but sometimes you will find that spark that allows you to take that bit of courage and run a mile through your fears. I promise, that with will power comes hardship, but it's worth it and every single one you is capable.

Overall, this year has been full of many achievements. But there have been also some times of severe depression, suicidal thoughts and self harm and feeling utterly lost and out of control, especially during the Summer months. These elements are still present in my life and are things I still tackle on a daily basis, however I feel I have improved year on year and it just goes to show, even if you have faced times of extreme lows, you can still go ahead and achieve things. We are not alone in this battle, and I know you have the strength to battle this illness. It's not easy, but it's definitely worth it.

I'd love to hear what your year has been like.  Let me know in the comments below.


what is meant by mental health?

We all have a mind and we all know that it doesn't always work as it should do, just like any other area of our body. Although I have addressed the problems and advice coming from certain mental health problems, I haven't addressed what mental health is itself. 

Everyone has a mind, and looking after it is just as important as looking after your body because without one, you can't necessarily do as well without the other. It's becoming more common that perhaps people's mental health isn't as it should be - 1 in 4! This tends to be defined under the umbrella term of mental illness.
Just as if you were to have a physical illness, mental illness just means that your mental health isn't working perhaps as it should do, for example causing different behaviours and moods. Disorders can include anxiety, depression, schizophrenia and so on and these all have a range of remedies to try and help bring your mental health back to where you'd want it to be. 

Just like physical illness, recovering from mental illness may take a while and may take a range of different remedies to find the best way for you to get better. 

Mental health is the same as physical health and it's just about trying to get better in the best way you can. It's common to experience mental illness and you shouldn't be ashamed of doing so. Getting a cast for a broken leg is just as important as getting medication to balance your serotonin. 

Best Wishes,
Amy Xx

Self harm advice

This post is following on from my previous one giving an introduction to self harm, which you can read, here. This time round, I'm going to share with you some advice of perhaps other coping techniques, or how to deal with self harm itself.


  • Talk - talking is always key. If you have someone to whom you can share how you're feeling with, I believe the chances of self-harming reduces because the intensity that you're feeling should lessen. You also know that you have that support around you.
  • Find your own techniques - Self harm for me tends to be something that can happen when you can't find any other way to release the tension and to not take part in it, can require a lot of will power. But to try and avoid it - try to do things such as going outside, doing kick boxing, mindfulness, talking and so forth. Give yourself the image of how you would feel afterwards.
  • Thinking - If you have the urge to self harm, try to give yourself some breathing time to consider whether you really want to go down that route or not. Giving yourself this time can mean that you don't harm myself in the end.
  • Care - If you do find yourself self-harming, don't feel ashamed. It doesn't mean that you have taken a few steps back, it just means you needed to do something to get rid of the pain you were feeling. Of course, embarking on less harmful ways of reliving pain is something to work on. Make sure that you look after any wounds, and give yourself some time to heal afterwards. 
You can find Mind's self harm advice, here.

I hope this has helped in some way. If you have any other advice, please leave a comment below.

Best Wishes,
Amy Xx 

Early intervention

I cannot stress this enough. Early intervention is so important. As people say 'old habits die hard' and this true in terms of mental illness. As years go by, the more you will reinforce your actions, thought patterns and reactions. This in turn, makes it harder for you to break them. I know that this is true for myself. I had been using the same safety behaviours for many years and I had the same thought patterns, kind of being stuck at at young age whilst growing older. In this way, I had felt too young and anxious to drive, to have a job, to catch a bus and so on. But, with proper counselling and CBT I am finally getting to a point where I have almost retrained my thought patterns, so that I think and react in different ways. I know that this would have been easier many years earlier, but I didn't know I had a problem with my mental health for many years. For those that do, it's so important that you get help as early as possible. Don't get me wrong, the mental health services we have here in the UK are pretty poor, but that doesn't mean that you should be put off by a doctor who doesn't understand or a long waiting list - I have been there. The longer you rely on your old ways, the more ingrained it becomes and the harder it is to get out of it. That doesn't mean that you won't, it just might take you longer. 

I so wish that there better mental health services, so we could nip the problem in the bud before it even begins to grow. Imagine, if even children could be taught about mental health and have access to someone who they could talk to at such a young age. I feel the problems could be lessened, so that it wouldn't necessarily be as of a big problem as they got older. Even though the mental health services aren't amazing, talking, doing your own CBT, and even going down to your local GP are all steps in the right direction and I strongly encourage those struggling to take a stand and take a step towards their recovery. It's not easy, but it's definitely worth it. 

You can get there. 

Best Wishes,
Amy Xx

Something my counsellor has taught me...

Everything we experience makes us who we are. For some of us, certain parts of our lives affect us more than others and become a strong part of our habits and subconscious thoughts. As many of you know, a part of my childhood still lives with me in my daily life and I tend to rely on that mindset when I am uncomfortable or anxious. However, this kind of behaviour is not useful for me because I am not a young child any more. I don't want to be stuck with the low confidence level and worried reactions that I had when I was that age. For example, when I am driving alone I have the voice in my head that I am not old enough to do it and this is the voice I have doing a range of challenging things, purely because I had a trauma at a young age and it's almost like I am stuck in time. This voice, is not the voice of a 20 year old, but of my former self. It's strange how traumas can still make you act in certain ways. But this is normal for people who go through problems like this because you have lived like that for so long. In my case, it must be around 13 years of reinforcing those voices and habits!

My counsellor showed me a few diagrams, which showed me how we have a parental part of us, an adult part of us (our current state) and our child self and all three parts make up who we are today. These three parts are split up further into sections, and for some of us, one section will be stronger that another. In my case, my child state is strongest with criticism (probably because I felt I needed to be in control at that age)  and my parent state is strongest for nurturing over others (because I certainly give myself a really hard time!) The aim for me to increase the nurturing of myself and to give myself an easier time and weaken the subconscious voice of my younger self, because I'm not her any more. I'm an adult who is fully capable to take on what ever comes my way. 

I hope this make sense! 
Amy Xx

Guest post: Neil

An Anxious Comedian Attempts To Talk About It

Public speaking is terrifying. All my life, it's been one of my worst fears... and as someone who has also lived with anxiety for much of my life, that's saying a lot.
But it was also something I've always been drawn towards. This poses a problem. If I don't get up on stage and speak or do standup comedy, I feel weak and pathetic for being too scared to do something I want to do. But if I do, then I have to face my fear of public speaking.

In the end, I decided if I was going to suffer either way, I might as well DO the thing rather than sitting around miserably wishing I had.

For years, this was the arrangement. I'd get up on stage, make jokes, have fun... but one thing remained off limits: talking publicly about my anxiety. This added to the pain my anxiousness caused me – I was too scared of it to even talk about it.

Partly, I think I subconsciously believed that talking aloud about anxiety – even only acknowledging its existence – could somehow make it stronger.
This is wrong, of course. So now I've decided to take that power away from anxiety. I'm sharing about it publicly, to show my anxiety that I don't fear it anymore – and hopefully to help others to do the same.

One of the things I've learned is that opening up is important. And through this I was invited to give a TED talk about my anxiety, where I shared the other important part of what I've learned: that it helps a surprising amount to compare anxiety to custard. Allow me to explain: http://tedxtalks.ted.com/video/Walking-on-Custard-How-Physics


Okay, so if you've seen the video then you'll know a few more things about me... including that I apparently can't operate very simple slide-changing machinery.
But let's ignore that for now. I want to talk more about openness. Like I said, it feels so natural to keep our troubles a secret. We're afraid of judgement, of vulnerability, of being hurt... of so many things.

We shouldn't feel bad about finding it hard to talk. It's natural, it's common, it's human to struggle with vulnerability. But it doesn't have to remain this way.

Bottling anxiety up gives it extra power, and sharing about it takes that power away. More than that: our openness helps others to be open themselves. Each time we share our troubles, we take a small step towards creating a world where more people feel free to say "I feel that way too!"

The more I've spoken publicly about anxiety, the more people have said to me: "Me too!"
Of course, it's crucial to choose how, where and who we share our struggles with. Openness is important, but so is feeling safe.

I think that often the very first step to reduce the power of our anxiety is to begin talking about it with someone that we trust.

It's a long journey from there to peacefulness, but it's a long journey I hope we can share with one another.

Neil Hughes is the author of 'Walking on Custard & the Meaning of Life: A Guide for Anxious Humans'. You can find him at www.walkingoncustard.com or talking nonsense on Twitter as @enhughesiasm. He likes it when you say hello.

Guest post: Mary's story

Anxiety: A Half Life

I am thirty years old and I have had anxiety since I was fifteen; I’m assuming there must have been some kind of trigger but I’ve never been able to pin it down to one specific moment in my life. Perhaps that’s not important anyway.

Anxiety feeling out of control but having to be in control. It’s being afraid but being unable to name the fear.

I have had anxiety for fifteen years but it feels like forever, I can’t remember how it feels not to have anxiety anymore and I’m terrified this will always be my life. For the last ten years I have been agoraphobic, for six months out of those ten years I couldn’t leave my bedroom, for the last two years I was making progress, getting out with my husband, visiting family – I even made it on a bus!  - but then three months ago I was in town with my mum and had a BIG panic attack, you know the kind where you think you’re going to pass out and be sick? Lovely! As you can imagine I was devastated, it was the first time anxiety had made me go back home in two years and since then I’ve been struggling to do the things I was doing so well at...walking the dogs, going out to town with a friend...so I did what I should have done a long time ago – I asked for help.


I had done this once before in my old town but the mental health service was...less than helpful. I was basically told if you can’t get in to see us we can’t help you – not very helpful for someone suffering with agoraphobia!

Luckily the new county I live in has an excellent mental health service and I was put on medication, which after a bit of trial and error began to work and appointments were made for me to begin CBT which best of all could be done over the phone!

I have been on Fluoxetine for a month now and so far I’ve had CBT three times; I’ve learnt that when I thought I was doing well I actually wasn’t because I was using ‘safety behaviours’ such as my MP3, bottle of water, tissues and always having someone with me which meant I wasn’t letting my brain deal with or learn how to cope with anxiety. So now I go out every day without any safety behaviours, so far I can only get to the top of my street but it’s such an achievement for me and my therapist is really happy with my progress; my next aim is to get to the shops by myself and then I’ll be going in a shop, alone for the first time in...far too long!

It’s hard and it’s horrible because the only way you can get over it is by letting yourself feel the anxiety which is the hardest thing in the world. It’s like if someone was scared of snakes and the only way for them to get over the fear was to stand in a bucket of snakes for one hour...but will it be worth it? YES!

Mary Hoyle

tree-trunk@hotmail.co.uk

Self-harm


This post may be triggering. Please do not continue reading if you feel it may be. 

According to selfharm.co.uk The phrase ‘self-harm’ is used to describe a wide range of behaviours. Self-harm is often understood to be a physical response to an emotional pain of some kind.' 


Self harm can often come in conjunction with a range mental illnesses, including depression. Although it may provide temporary relief, it's best to try to avoid it if possible because of the way you may feel afterwards - which is often worse. 

Self harming can come in a range of different ways and can be under the umbrella of self harm if it is done purposely. It is also possible for it to become addictive. 

I want you to know that it's nothing to be ashamed of. I know in public, it's something that many people hide by covering up their wrists and body or by staying inside. It's something people would never know about unless you saw it. But, never feel ashamed. You're not weak for self-harming because you are fighting through something so massive that you cannot hold onto the pain.

For some, there is a misunderstanding that it is about attention, and although this may be a very negligible amount, it seems almost incomprehensible that someone would want to harm themselves to such a painful and horrific extent, that it was just for attention. It's well known that it can be a symptom of a range of mental illnesses. 
You and I both know that it's a difficult issue to talk about, but it is so important to talk to someone because there is usually a route cause of the problem. It's easier said than done, but getting help is so important.

Stay strong. I know it's hard, but you can bounce back. 









I should?

I've always been hard on myself. My best has never been good enough and even when I had done something well, I never let myself revel in it for too long before I move on to what I think should be my next improvement. 

I found myself talking to my counsellor about this and I also wrote about this in a previous post, that I should be over a traumatic experience by now, I should have a paid job by now and the list could go on. I'm forever searching for ways to be better and although we should all strive to become better people, I find that it is becoming detrimental that I am never feeling that I am good enough or if I do well and I don't give myself a chance to celebrate. It was suggested that part of the reason for this may be because I don't like attention drawn to me, thus I tend to move on quickly from achievements. It's hard to dwell too much on what I've achieved and it's probably about time that I did. 

I feel that the more pressure we put on ourselves in regards to our lives and mental illnesses, the worse we are going to feel. There is no one else out there telling me what I should be doing and what I should overcome because I am on my own journey and I am not competing with others. We all have our individual qualities, and what we may think are aspects that we need to improve about ourselves, may be someone else's goal. It's important to give yourself credit for what you have achieved as mental illness is an extremely hard battle. It may take a lot of willpower to take the stress off of yourself and allow yourself to stretch out and accept the strength that you have - I know it will for me. I have been trying to be easier on myself for many years and although I have improved a bit, it is still really hard for me to let go of that niggling voice that is telling me to do more and to be better. But, it is possible to improve and I hope you can join me on this journey. 

Let's try to take some time to reflect on all of things we are proud of and all of things we have achieved. You may be surprised at how well you have done. 




Guest post: Marathon Marcus

Stigmas about depression push us back into the dark ages 

Let's look at some stigmas for people with depression:

Stigma 1: Looking sad or unkept shows that you are suffering. 

Truth 1: When in fact this is untrue you can use various defence mechanisms to disguise how you feel. Because of the shame of admitting to the illness, or at times lack of wanting to disclose the truth when asked, as if that will show you as weak. Some people with depression are very good at hiding it.

Stigma 2: Depression only comes about when something awful occurs.

Truth 2: Depression can be attributed to a number of different things, including biological imbalances, family history, hormones etc etc. Depression isn't only feeling sad for a short period of time, it can affect one's daily life for several months or years. It can feel mentally paralysing without treatment.  

Stigma 3: Attending talking therapy means that you are weak or crazy.

Truth 3: Attending talking therapy shows you acknowledge the challenge and your showing strength to manage it. Generally if  people have psychotherapy, people think your crazy. Whereas if you think about sports psychology or psychology courses used in corporate business that is somehow accepted as normal. Psychology however you brand it (life, work, sports) it allows you to look deeper into your problems and worries, and deal with troublesome habits, and better manage and recognise trigger points.

Stigma 4: People with depression are mentally weak.

Truth 4: It's said that when people commit suicide they generally don't leave suicide notes. Families and friends may know the person is struggling but are often left shocked that the pain experienced by their loved one is so extreme to end their life. People with depression can be very good at containing their illness, and not expressing the pain they truly feel for a number of reasons. If your not convinced have a read of the book Depressive Illness: The Curse of the Strong by Dr. Tim Cantopher 

Stigma 5: Depression is all in your head, there are no physical symptoms, it's not like having a broken leg.

Truth 5:
Physical symptoms include:
  • Moving or speaking more slowly than usual 
  • Overactive bladder syndrome. The need to pass urine frequently
  • Change in appetite or weight (usually decreased, but sometimes increased) constipation
  • Unexplained aches and pains
  • Lack of energy or lack of interest in sex (loss of libido)
  • Changes to your menstrual cycle
  • Disturbed sleep (for example, finding it hard to fall asleep at night or waking up very early in the morning)
  • Fight or flight. With all that adrenaline going round, it keeps you tense and it's not healthy to stay in a heightened state for a prolonged period (NHS 2016)

There are many other stigmas I could discuss but my point is that, depression is not imaginary. We all need to be conscious of it, and support those who we suspect are suffering with compassion rather than contempt.

How seriously do we treat illnesses like cancer? 

1 in 4 people will be affected by mental health. So let's look at the facts. In the UK the male suicide rate is the highest since 2001. The suicide rate among men aged 45-59, 25.1 per 100,000, is the highest for this group since 1981 (The Samaritans 2015).

The same way we take cancer seriously, is because people die from cancer and this is the same way we need to view depression which also takes lives. Even those who are alive it stops them from living.

There are lots of different treatments for mental health and your doctor is best placed to advise if your struggling.

But I believe that physical activity and connecting with others can help alongside other treatment.

Studies show that exercise can treat mild to moderate depression as effectively as antidepressant medication but without the side-effects, of course. In addition to relieving depression symptoms, research also shows that maintaining an exercise schedule can prevent people from relapsing. It also releases endorphins, powerful chemicals in your brain that energize your spirits and make you feel good. Finally, exercise can also serve as a distraction, allowing you to find some quiet time to break out of the cycle of negative thoughts that feed depression.

I've run 8 marathons and the benefits of physical exercise, have really helped in regards to the mental health challenges I've faced. And it is my goal to encourage other people in a similar situation to gain this benefit. And also witness other positive benefits of running in other aspects in their lives.

It's my goal to setup a running club, which focuses on well being, togetherness rather than egos and pb's. The running club is called Team Revenant. The word Revenant means someone who returns from a long absence, or a person or thing reborn. With depression it can bring people down, but I want to encourage people that there is a way back. Please help me break the stigma.

If your interested get in touch:

Twitter: @marathon_marcus
Instagram: @themarathonmarcus

Out Smart cards!

The other day I was contact by a company called 'out smart cards' offering to send me their product to help with stress and anxiety. I thought I'd share the product, because I feel that their product would and will help a lot of you! 

Out smart cards is a company which seems to be based upon some sort of mindfulness. Currently, there are loads of mindfulness colouring books out there, but these cards are slightly different. Depending on the pack you get given, you get given a small pack of cards which are a perfect size to carry in your pocket or in your bag ready for the times that you become anxious. The aim is to give you some time to breathe and to reduce the anxiety you are feeling by tracing the patterns on the card with a pen. You can stop and start whenever and wherever you like and it allows the brain to focus on something else rather than your anxiety.

I have included some pictures below so you know what they look like. If you wish to buy some then you can do so by visiting their website, here.







Step by step

Sometimes people come to me for advice for their anxiety and depression. What I tend to say seems to follow a similar formula and step by step process. To help more of you, I thought I would share this guide with you. Please remember that I am not a doctor, and this is based upon my own experience.



A lot of the time, people who ask me for advice have never had any help for their illness and so I suggest the following:
  • Talk - talking is key. A lot of people don't like to talk about their mental illness because they feel ashamed or because they don't want to burden their family and friends. I strongly advise people to talk because bottling things up will cause more damage than good. The people who support you in your everyday life, love you very much and will want to support you through your illness. Please try not to see it as a burden. If you found out that a friend or family member was ill and they didn't tell you, you would've wanted to know and wanted to help them. I know it's scary, but please try to talk through your problems. I know if I didn't, I wouldn't be here today.
  • See you doctor - If people have never sought any professional advice before, I suggest that they see their doctor to get on the road to recovery. Your doctor will have access to services and can refer you if need be. I know it's scary to talk to your doctor, but it's very important to do so. Remember that not all doctors are trained in mental health and the first doctor you see may not understand. Don't give up, see another doctor to see if they will be more understanding. 
  • Counselling - usually doctors will advise counselling as a first step. Here in the UK there is a long waiting list on the NHS, nevertheless it is important to sign up because the services they offer are really beneficial. You can also find other counselling services in your area, online. Counselling can allow you to get to the root of your problems and hopefully get you on your way to recovery.
  • Lifestyle changes - I know lots of people recommend lifestyle changes, which I don't completely agree with. I feel that something simple as a lifestyle change cannot help people with mental illness and counselling and medication may be the way forward. However, little changes such as diet, exercise and yoga for example can all help in their own ways.
  • Medication - medication for me was a final step. I had followed all of the steps I have just written and I was still severely depressed and anxious. I couldn't keep living the way I was. Although I didn't want to take medication in the first place, I am extremely happy I did because it has changed my life for the better. Your doctor will be able to help you with this and if at first the medication doesn't work, you can always try another.
Don't be ashamed. Be proud,
Amy Xx

My Buddy Box


I was so excited when I got contacted to review Blurt Foundation's Buddy Box. For those of you who don't know, Blurt Foundation is an organisation that is helping people through their mental illnesses, namely depression. Not too long along ago, they set up a monthly box which they send to their subscribers filled with a range of different things to help you through that month and continue to help you battle your struggles. I like to think that it's a hug in a box. Although it won't solve your mental illness, it certainly does help to have things that can help you through it. I'm really happy that such a service exists because I forever see boxes for beauty, but I have never seen one dedicated to those who are affected by depression. I can't wait to try all of the items included and see how they help me along my way. 



This month's box included a notebook and pencil, some tea, some seaweed for the bath, some postcards and an origami set. I will certainly be using the notebook and pencil as I am always writing, as for the seaweed I find having baths as a great way to reduce anxiety and so I will try it next time round. Tea is also another calming method I use - I always find it it to be a cuddle in a cup. However, I've never tried this flavour so it will be all new to me. And finally, I used to do origami when I was younger, but I gave it up. I never seem to do many things that are creative these days so perhaps this is a sign to get back into something like this. It's also a great way to take a step back from the day and have some time not think about the world around you. 



I am really impressed with this box and I think it will help many people. If you're interested in becoming a subscriber or wish to get a box for someone you love, then click, here.

Thanks again,

Guest post: Khiron House

Now and then I have the occasional guest post here on my blog, and today's post is from Khiron house. I hope reading both this blog post and mine on tips to help with anxiety, will help with your recovery.

9 steps to deal with anxiety

Dealing with anxiety every day can feel like a losing battle, especially when you feel like you’re the only person dealing with it. In the UK it has been estimated one in six people will suffer anxiety or depression every year. It’s important to know that you’re not alone and there are many ways to help you deal with anxiety.

Here are nine steps you can introduce into your daily life to help reduce anxiety and chances of having a panic attack.

1) Be early

At any event, make an effort to get there early so you’re not rushing. Being afraid or nervous about being late to an appointment can make you feel really stressed. You can avoid this by making sure you set off early so you can erase any possibility of being late.

2) Follow a routine

You can sometimes feel stressed if your plans get thrown off course, whilst you can’t always control your daily schedule, you can try to follow a routine that can minimise any stressful situations from rising up. 

3) Start the day positive

I understand this one is not always easy. But, if you can start the day on a positive note, it can help pave the rest of your day. Before you even get out of bed, think about three positive things: these can be three things you’re thankful for or three things that make you smile (like that cute puppy video you watched the other day). This simple daily routine can relieve stress and naturally make you feel happy.

4) Get plenty of sleep

Getting enough sleep is important for many reasons. Along with benefiting your health, sleep can also benefit your attitude and dispel any negative feelings. When you’ve had a bad night’s sleep you can sometimes feel sensitive and easily stressed, but getting enough sleep can contribute toward having a positive outlook.

5) Exercise

Doing daily exercise has been proven to help with anxiety. Yoga is regularly recommended because it’s a soft and relaxing exercise. Yoga helps stretch your muscles, relieve stress and the controlled breathing summons a wonderful feeling of calmness and serenity.

6) Avoid caffeine

I understand you might enjoy your cup of coffee in the morning but caffeine can make you feel even more stressed. Studies have shown that caffeine can inhibit the way you cope with anxiety and can provoke panic attacks. Instead of caffeine, get plenty of sleep or try exercise as that helps reduce stress and releases endorphins.

7) Write it down

Get in a habit of writing your thoughts and feelings down. Writing is a recommended therapy when dealing with anxiety because you can write down your worries and it helps you process those moments. Keep a journal with you or wait until you get home in the evening to write down what you did that day.

8) Controlled breathing

Often you can calm your nerves with a simple breathing technique. Take a smooth, deep breath through your nose, feel your diaphragm stretch. Hold it for a moment. Then slowly release the air through your mouth. Repeat the technique. Focus on your breathing. Controlled breathing exercises relieves stress and helps calm anxiety. You can do the breathing technique standing or sitting, but personally I find it easier to stand.

9) Speak to a therapist

The process of talking to someone can be very beneficial when you’re dealing with anxiety. Speaking to friends and family is always recommended but if you find it hard to talk to them, try speaking to a therapist. Seeing a trained therapist on a regular occasion can be therapeutic and they can offer advice on how to treat your anxiety.

There are many ways to deal with anxiety, don’t let it take over your life.

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Calming breathing techniques

One way to reduce your levels of anxiety is through breathing techniques. Here, I have listed various different breathing techniques that may help you. Choose the right ones for you!


  • Exhaling longer - the simplest technique is to exhale for longer than you breathe in. For example If you breathe in for 5 seconds, exhale for 10. Repeat this until you feel a lot calmer. 
  • The box - find something that is square or rectangle in nature and focus on it. Focus on one side at a time and scan the object in a clockwise manner. If you start at the side of the object, breathe in for the length of the side of the object, then exhale for the length of the top of the object and carry on for the other two sides, inhaling and exhaling in turns.
  • Numbers - with this, you follow a pattern. Start by breathing for 1 and exhaling for 2, then inhaling for 2 and exhaling for 3, then inhaling for 3 and exhaling for 4 and so forth until you get to 10 and start over again. 
These are my top three techniques. Do you have any others you'd like to share?

Mindfulness

One method I use to battle my anxiety and depression is through mindfulness.
A lot of people recommend it and although it is beneficial, I don't think it can fully cure you from your struggles.

Mindfulness is about taking time out of your day to focus on yourself and to block the world out. It provides an escape and a focus on your mental health. I find on an everyday basis I can get stressed and caught up in the happenings around me and sometimes taking time away from that is just what I need - and you can do it too!

All you need to do is find somewhere you feel calm and relaxed, such as the garden or your bedroom and find somewhere comfortable to lay or sit. Some people prefer to sit in silence, but I prefer to find some meditation or sleeping music on youtube which helps to calm me. I tend to spend around 10 - 20 minutes with my eyes closed, focusing on my breathing and the muscles in my body. I focus on my breathing through taking a shorter breath in than the breath I exhale or I use number counting to count the seconds of my breath. With my body, I tend to start at the top of my head and imagine every muscle relaxing until I get to the tip of my toes. If I feel my mind wondering, I try to bring it back by focusing on my breathing.

It may be difficult at first, but once you get it, you can feel completely refreshed, calm and sometimes even quite light!

Lots of people recommend it and I personally think it's something that is helpful to all.