Guest post: Marathon Marcus

Stigmas about depression push us back into the dark ages 

Let's look at some stigmas for people with depression:

Stigma 1: Looking sad or unkept shows that you are suffering. 

Truth 1: When in fact this is untrue you can use various defence mechanisms to disguise how you feel. Because of the shame of admitting to the illness, or at times lack of wanting to disclose the truth when asked, as if that will show you as weak. Some people with depression are very good at hiding it.

Stigma 2: Depression only comes about when something awful occurs.

Truth 2: Depression can be attributed to a number of different things, including biological imbalances, family history, hormones etc etc. Depression isn't only feeling sad for a short period of time, it can affect one's daily life for several months or years. It can feel mentally paralysing without treatment.  

Stigma 3: Attending talking therapy means that you are weak or crazy.

Truth 3: Attending talking therapy shows you acknowledge the challenge and your showing strength to manage it. Generally if  people have psychotherapy, people think your crazy. Whereas if you think about sports psychology or psychology courses used in corporate business that is somehow accepted as normal. Psychology however you brand it (life, work, sports) it allows you to look deeper into your problems and worries, and deal with troublesome habits, and better manage and recognise trigger points.

Stigma 4: People with depression are mentally weak.

Truth 4: It's said that when people commit suicide they generally don't leave suicide notes. Families and friends may know the person is struggling but are often left shocked that the pain experienced by their loved one is so extreme to end their life. People with depression can be very good at containing their illness, and not expressing the pain they truly feel for a number of reasons. If your not convinced have a read of the book Depressive Illness: The Curse of the Strong by Dr. Tim Cantopher 

Stigma 5: Depression is all in your head, there are no physical symptoms, it's not like having a broken leg.

Truth 5:

Physical symptoms include:

• Moving or speaking more slowly than usual 
• Overactive bladder syndrome. The need to pass urine frequently
• Change in appetite or weight (usually decreased, but sometimes increased) constipation
• Unexplained aches and pains
• Lack of energy or lack of interest in sex (loss of libido)
• Changes to your menstrual cycle
• Disturbed sleep (for example, finding it hard to fall asleep at night or waking up very early in the morning)
• Fight or flight. With all that adrenaline going round, it keeps you tense and it's not healthy to stay in a heightened state for a prolonged period (NHS 2016)

There are many other stigmas I could discuss but my point is that, depression is not imaginary. We all need to be conscious of it, and support those who we suspect are suffering with compassion rather than contempt.

How seriously do we treat illnesses like cancer? 

1 in 4 people will be affected by mental health. So let's look at the facts. In the UK the male suicide rate is the highest since 2001. The suicide rate among men aged 45-59, 25.1 per 100,000, is the highest for this group since 1981 (The Samaritans 2015).

The same way we take cancer seriously, is because people die from cancer and this is the same way we need to view depression which also takes lives. Even those who are alive it stops them from living.

There are lots of different treatments for mental health and your doctor is best placed to advise if your struggling.

But I believe that physical activity and connecting with others can help alongside other treatment.

Studies show that exercise can treat mild to moderate depression as effectively as antidepressant medication but without the side-effects, of course. In addition to relieving depression symptoms, research also shows that maintaining an exercise schedule can prevent people from relapsing. It also releases endorphins, powerful chemicals in your brain that energize your spirits and make you feel good. Finally, exercise can also serve as a distraction, allowing you to find some quiet time to break out of the cycle of negative thoughts that feed depression.

I've run 8 marathons and the benefits of physical exercise, have really helped in regards to the mental health challenges I've faced. And it is my goal to encourage other people in a similar situation to gain this benefit. And also witness other positive benefits of running in other aspects in their lives.

It's my goal to setup a running club, which focuses on well being, togetherness rather than egos and pb's. The running club is called Team Revenant. The word Revenant means someone who returns from a long absence, or a person or thing reborn. With depression it can bring people down, but I want to encourage people that there is a way back. Please help me break the stigma.

If your interested get in touch:

Email: themarathonmarcus@gmail.com

Twitter: @marathon_marcus

Instagram: @themarathonmarcus

On the rampage (stigma)

A few months ago, I did a three part series on stigma which you can find below:

• Part 1
• Part 2
• Part 3

This post however, I have felt the need to write after mental health coming up in a few discussions in class and it appears that quite a few people still have the impression that everyone with a mental illness is a person who is running around on a rampage. How wrong they are! This post will hopefully clear it up for anyone who still has the idea of such a stereotype. I am not an expert in every field of mental illness and I am still learning about my own every day, but I aim to get rid of some myths in today's post. In this post by Time To Change, it dispels some myths about mental illness and I advise you to take a look.

In the meantime, here are a few of my personal favourite mental myth busting facts:  

1. People who are mentally ill are violent - The majority are not violent. People with mental health are more likely to be victimised. From hearing in discussions, when people talk about mental illness they just think of violence and horror movies. I suffer mainly with anxiety as a mental illness and I am not violent. My Auntie who suffers with depression is not a person whom goes around like you see in the horror movies either. As can be seen in the dispute between Asda and Tesco with their halloween costumes, the majority of people with a mental illness are not like that. We are normal people. Mental illness doesn't define me. I am not a mental illness. I am me, with mental illness being something I must deal with. I find it very sad when the first words that people come out with when thinking about mental illness is: dangerous, violent and crazy. Too often the use of the word mental and comparing a person to someone in a mental institution is just reinforcing the stereotype. They are many in institutions who are suffering with conditions such as eating disorders and depression. It gives an increasing importance to get rid of the stigma.

2. If you're mentally ill, you would've been sectioned - not the case. There are many people with eating disorders, anxiety, depression and others that are not sectioned. There is often help within the community, people who go to therapy sessions and so on. Many can live a next to normal life.

3. You can see if someone's mentally ill - not true. If you saw me you wouldn't even guess it. I've had many a friend tell me 'I would never have expected it to be you'. Just because you can't see it doesn't mean there's no effect.The videos below from Time To Change may help you to have a new outlook, if not already. 

Best Wishes,

Diary of Anxiety

This isn't usually the type of post that I would write, but I'm hoping it will still be beneficial. There are so many people out there that don't understand anxiety and it's true to say, it will never be completely understood unless you have experienced it yourself. I hope that for the sufferers of the condition you will be able to relate to this somehow and for others, I'm hoping you understand how hard it can be for some people.

A diary of anxiety

Different aspects of your life will be affected depending on what type of anxiety you have and how severe it is. For those who suffer with severe anxiety, life can be a living hell and it is with you 24/7. 

Sometimes it will be present in your sleep. Your body will be preparing for the day ahead with the flight or fight response. This means one of two things; either interrupted sleep, or feeling tired when waking up. From the moment you wake, anxiety takes action with adrenaline rushing through your veins. You wake up everyday feeling ill because your body has heightened anxiety due to the daily tasks you have to complete, such as going to school or catching public transport. 

You've put up with this anxiety for a long time now and it's tiring. You feel ill when you wake, so you don't feel like doing much. You don't feel like putting makeup on or putting more effort into the way you dress. You can only eat little, because your anxiety is just too bad and you're always exhausted. You just want to stay in a safe place, where you can be calm for a while. For many people; this is home. 

Your anxiety is so crippling and disabling that it stops you from doing anything that you love. You get heightened anxiety any time you try to attempt to do something, which often ends in a panic attack or avoidance. As a result, you end up staying at home; again. Everything in your life is constant battle with your brain. You struggle and often avoid school, public transport, driving lessons, getting a job, joining a club and speaking in front of class. 
You try with every inch of your body and all of your might, to complete a simple task as to catch a bus, but it often results in hours of emotional and physical pain and angst about the thought. 

You're always told not to compare yourself to others but sometimes you can't help but notice the people around you. When you see other people your age with jobs, going to school without a second thought and driving, you can't help but feel a little bit hopeless.

It's all well and good saying that you are in control of your destiny, but when it seems you have a great brick wall in front of your every step, your legs are heavy and you feel like you're wading through thick mud, it's extremely hard to believe. But then you wake up one morning feeling okay and this is a very rare occasion but you're feeling good. You manage to overcome some of your fears and at the end of the day you feel ecstatic. You know that this is a taste of what life should be and could be like. You feel as if you've crawled out of this deep dark hole and seen the light. You know recovery isn't going to be easy, but it's the good days you've got to hold on to. You know that even if the crippling anxiety comes back the next day, you've experienced some sort relief.

Do people really understand?

As mentioned in previous posts, some people may not understand and this is why there is stigma, discrimination and bullying.

The problem is you will only know what it feels like if you experience it. However there are some great people out there such as your therapists, friends and family who will all try their best to understand and support you. You could have all of the information in the world on the topic, but still not fully understand it.

The best thing you can do to help a person understand is to try and explain it to them simply. You could use the flight or fight system as a short example. Of course, they may still find this weird...after all, panicking about getting into a car may seem strange to another person. The way my mum explained it to my teachers is likening it to a phobia. When I had severe problems with getting into school, my mum explained that it's like having a phobia of spiders. You're scared of them, but you don't know why.

The many people who support you and love you will try their best to understand and even if they don't, they will still continue to support you. As you've read in the last post, there are a few family members and friends that don't understand and have said that to me, but are still ever so kind. But there are people that won't understand and may be quite ignorant about it and that is their problem. Until they've experienced it themselves, they will never know. They may make sweeping statements or get angry - just ignore it and try to explain to them if they're willing. Not everybody is going to understand your situation, just like not every person understands every single maths problem.

Remember that you need support throughout your recovery, not people who don't care and this is where you have to be a little bit selfish. Keep going!

Stigma

Stigma: 'A mark of disgrace associated with a particular circumstance, quality, or person: "the stigma of mental disorder"'

If there's a word you can think of when mentioning mental health, it is definitely stigma. In fact this is the main issue when looking at mental health. Many people are really scared of saying anything about their mental health incase they will be judged which can become a dangerous situation to be in.

Firstly there are laws out there which protect people from discrimination, such as the laws about mental health that can be applied in the workplace. However, as you might as well know they aren't always followed. So what else is there? These laws are there for your safety and protection and if you feel you are being mistreated you can always take it to a tribunal. No one is allowed to make you feel worthless, especially in the eyes of the law.

Secondly there are many organisations out there that are trying to get rid of mental health as a 'taboo' subject. The most important campaign to me is 'Time To Change'. You may have seen the adverts on the TV and videos on YouTube, which I advise you check out if you haven't already. There is also a pledge wall which I have signed, along with stories and how you can help - even more resources to make you realise that you are not alone! Anxiety UK, is a great charity too along with Childline. 

Stigma is a massive issue when it comes to mental illness. I have had great issues when trying to explain my anxiety and people either not listening, not thinking it's a big deal and just brushing it off as if they don't have to care. But, generally people have been supportive.

Family

In terms of my family, they have been very accepting. They haven't punished me for it, or been ashamed of me. I think this is because I have a very good relationship with my family, but also there are others in the family which suffer from mental illness too. They also saw me suffer before their eyes and with anxiety, it's hard to hide anything. I never really told them upfront but I guess they just knew and/or found out and when they did find out, they didn't treat me any differently. But there were some members of my family which struggled to understand, which can be aggravating. However without them I have no idea what I'd do. They have literally saved me and I can never thank them enough for it. 

Friends

Through my anxiety, I have realised who my true friends are. I have had some friends who I never thought would help me out, but they have been the best. They've talked to me about it for hours, sent me school work and helped me in any which way they can. However, I have only told very few of my friends. I hate to say the reason why, but I guess it's because of the stigma. I'm worried about what they will think and if they will tell others. I've also had many people ask me why I've been off so much from school, but I just tend to reply with 'I have a few problems' or 'just because' or 'when I'm better I will explain' and as t's such a sensitive subject, and I rather keep it close.

Teachers

I never thought my teachers would be so helpful. My Mum and Grandma sent the school cards! I expect most if not all of the teachers don't understand my situation and they could easily just say I couldn't be bothered or remove me from the school, but they have been amazing and I can't thank them enough. Whether you like school or not, your teachers will have an impact on you for the rest of you life and you must understand that they are there to help you. If you feel you can't talk to your parents, then talk to your teachers. My teachers have been wonderful by organizing separate rooms for my exams, sending work home, calling me, checking if i'm okay in lessons; the list is endless! The thing I've been most grateful for is that they've talked to me. At the end of lessons they've asked how I am, that they're here if I need to talk and so on. One of my teachers even spoke to me about the stigma. He said 'This first thing you think people are going to think of you is crazy, but that's not true at all.' 

What I'm trying to say, is that yes there will be stigma and it definitely hurts because you know that you cannot help it. But the thing is, it's because people don't understand and this is why I'd really like it to be taught in schools and the workplace. You have to understand that you are bigger and better than anything anyone can say to you, and you've got this. If I can do it, so can you. I've been to darkest places of life, and I'm slowly getting there. So don't give up, and don't listen to the rubbish people reel out. It is extremely painful and angers you immensely when people say inconsiderate things about your health, but understand you are stronger. I know you may be worried about the stigma if you talk about your health, but believe me it's not as bad as you think; there are people out there to support you and it's never as bad as you presume, just look at the support I have had!

You must speak to someone, whether it be your family, teachers, friends, or even me. You will be better off with the support.

Why do I have anxiety?

Anyone suffering with anxiety, depression and any other related illness will ask the question 'why do I have this?'

I've asked this question about anxiety...many times! My therapists have tended to say that we mustn't look at the past, but the present. However the main point that has been repeated to me, is that you may never know why you have anxiety. I can understand that this isn't the answer we were all hoping for, but it's a very complex matter.

Some people can identify a time in their life which sparked off their problems, such as a parents divorce or a loss of a job. However for many people they will never be a hundred percent sure, or just have no clue. What's always been told to me is it tends to be a range of things that build up until we go 'bang' which in this case would be the cause of the anxiety.

It would be true to say that you could sit with a councillor and trawl through the past to find when it all happened, and perhaps find a trigger which may a hard task for some. But by starting at the roots of the problem, you can figure out a solution.